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Divorce is generally a stressful and unsettling event.At minimum, a major relationship is ending, all sorts of routines are upset, and in the midst of the stress of transition there are legal hoops to jump through before things can be resolved.While grief can be immobilizing at first, after a while, most grieving people find that, little by little, they are ready to move on with their lives.
Grief doesn't so much go away as it becomes irrelevant after a while. Most of the time it is best to allow yourself to grieve in the ways that come naturally to you, at least part of the time.
Eventually life comes back to 'normal' and the intensity of loss retreats.
There can be guilt over perceived failures to have made the relationship work.
There can be overwhelming depression at the thought of the seeming impossibility of being able to cope with all the changes that are required.
There are really two sides to the divorce process; the human emotional side and the formal legal side.
Different coping strategies and skills are appropriate to address each of these aspects of divorce.Though there is no 'cure' for these feelings, there are some good and healthy ways to cope with them so as to suffer as little as possible, and to gain in wisdom, compassion and strength from having gone through the experience.The emotional coping process starts with allowing one's self the freedom to grieve and ends with moving on with one's life. Grief is not a simple emotion itself, but rather is an instinctual emotional process that can invoke all sorts of emotional reactions as it runs its course.The grief process tends to unfold in predictable patterns.Most commonly, people move back and forth between a shocked, numb state characterized by denial, depression, and/or minimization of the importance of the loss, and outraged anger, fear, and vulnerability.All chores should be placed on the list in the order of their importance.